One|| This is Me
Two sets of footsteps barely made a sound on the rough and weathered wood of the bridge that led from Main Pacific to the Glands. The streetlights were dim as dusk settled and the last vestiges of light from the setting sun faded to night. Clouds lumbered in, blocking out any light from the two moons that shone overhead. Even the stars seemed less bright, dotted across their velvet backdrop.
With his golden dust, Graig Chen could conjure and wield anything by simply believing in its reality. If he wanted it to be real, it would be.
The Reverse was the most painful thing either of them had ever experienced, but Liam, a healer and Graig’s only confidant, had promised that they would be able to live in the Domain like normal Nomads, humans.
Graig and his pregnant fiancée were fleeing from their home world in secret, having no other choice if they desired a normal life for their unborn child.
They knew neither of their families would ever understand a love between a Light Caster and a Shadow Caster, even though it had been his grandmother who had always said, The heart wants what the heart wants. How could he have known that his heart would want a Shadow Caster, and not just any ordinary Shadow Caster? She was special, and so was her family. She was expected to uphold the family line with her offspring. Graig knew that did not include carrying the child of a Light Caster.
The two lovers could never live in peace, not since the balance between good and evil inside Revera had been thrown into upheaval. There were only two choices for Casters like them: light or dark. The balance couldnot accommodate a person containing both, so for his child’s sake, they had no choice but to leave Revera and live like normal humans in the Domain, what humans called reality. He’d found a perfect place, one he’d made sure no one would ever find, not even his two best friends.
They knew about the relationship; they’d been there when he’d first laid eyes on her, tried to talk him out of it, to forget the blonde bombshell who would only cause him misery. But they had been wrong. Without her his life would be spent in misery.
Her silver-blonde hair and bright blue eyes had done him in. If only he’d seen the bow that she’d aimed straight at his heart. If it hadn’t been for his love when the arrow hit, and for Liam, a healer, he wouldn’t be in his current predicament.
They faced a difficult task ahead, trying to leave this dimension. Although humans called it make-believe, Revera was far from that. It was the world of dreams, and Graig was a Level Four Caster whose missionwas to retrieve others living in the Domain out for Selene, their only live Somnium.
It was on one of these very missions that he had met the love of his life, the woman he couldn’t live without, and he didn’t care if she had black dust, he didn’t care that she was a Shadow Caster, a nightmare wielder. Yes, those horrible dreams that paralyze sleepers with fear were actually wielded by Casters, not some grave impression of the subconscious. They were responsible for doubts and forgotten dreams. She was his nightmare, a nightmare he was prepared to die for.
He knew that she would never survive living in his world, Revera. Yet hewas equally unable to cope with her world, the Oblivion, wherever it was. Oblivion was the realm of the Shadow Casters, created when Selene cast out Magdalena, the very first Shadow Caster, the third Somnium, as punishment for the death of her brother, Darius, the second Somnium. Magdalena had no realm to call her own, so she created Oblivion by focusing her hatred toward Selene, a world that could exist inside Revera, far from Selene’s sight. For years, Selene tried to find it, but as long as the Sodivic bloodline flowed through Shadow Casters’ veins, Oblivion would never be found by a Light Caster.
Sodivic blood was the key to Oblivion’s secrecy, and Magdalena’s family line. There were many Sodivics since the dawning of Oblivion, but Magdalena reigned over them all. Graig had met many Sodivics on his quests, each meeting always ending up in a bloody mess, and in all the years he had encountered them, not one had ever shown any kind of mercy or remorse. They were sadistic and couldn’t be reasoned with. He had been taught from a young age, if you see a Sodivic, you kill it. That wasthe number one rule taught to the Level One Light Casters.
His fiancée was the only one that proved his theory wrong. Over the pastcentury, their bloodline had been dying out, leaving her one of the few powerful Shadow Casters left.
Graig would pay dearly for loving her if her father ever found them, andhe couldn’t even think about what would happen to the unborn child she carried.
Graig squeezed the hand that was resting tightly inside his own as they neared the end of the bridge.
“We’re almost there, my love. Not much longer.”
“You’re sure nobody followed us?” Her eyes were wild, searching the darkness.
“I’m sure. Besides, they won’t be able to see us.” To gently remind her of what he was, he opened his hand and threw more golden sand into the air, shielding them from anything that tried to follow them.
Then he heard it. A crunch. He stopped abruptly and she slammed into him. One second of doubt was all it took to break the spell, and before he could react, they were surrounded by Nimgolians, the biggest and wickedest Shadow Hounds imaginable. They were evil, and reminded him ofa Rottweiler that had chased him one time in the Domain.
Dogs could see them, whereas humans couldn’t. He had always assumed the dust worked differently for animals. He used to toy with them. He’dtold Zac once it was a good workout, before hitting them with a dose of dust that would knock them out for at least half a day. Against these Shadow Hounds, however, his golden dust didn’t just put them to sleep… it put them to sleep forever.
“Take my bag.” Graig spoke softly, reaching out his hand.
“I’m not leaving you. I can fight.”
“These are your family. It’s enough that you have to know that they will die. I’m not going to let you kill them.”
Her voice was angry. “I don’t give a shit, Graig. You are my family now, you and Bean. Nobody else.”
Graig smiled. Ever since they’d found out that she was pregnant, she’d called the fetus Bean. Spinning her in his arms, he gave her a hard kiss and handed her a Celestial—an oval-shaped gel pendant that would take her and the child to their safe haven, in case he didn’t make it—and a small green bag filled with his dust. “Just in case,” he said, swallowing the lump in his throat.
“There is noin case.You make it, you hear?”
She planted a hard, passionate kiss on his lips. The kind that filled him with confidence. Suddenly he had no doubts, not even in that second,that would give away their hiding place.
“Vinicola, are you sure you want to do this?” growled one of the Shadow Casters, who was mounted on the back of a hound.
His voice made Graig’s skin crawl. Everything about them screamed evil. How that power ran through this fierce, beautiful creature standing next to him was beyond him.
Graig surveyed the Caster before him. His shoulder-length hair was wildand pure white, just like his love’s. He must be her relative, but how close he didn’t know. Yet the man didn’t look anything like her. He was big, broad-shouldered, and dirty.
Vinicola laughed, the laugh that Graig hated. It didn’t sound anythinglike her, but it was effective. They all knew that if they killed her, they would feel her father’s wrath. This was purely a retrieval mission, but it was a wipeout for him. “Sibian, you can tell him I’m done with Oblivion, and nothing you do will ever drag me back to that wretched hell-hole you love so much.”
“Your mind seems a bit clouded, dear,” the Shadow Caster said. “Let me refresh it.” He lifted his hands and let his dust flow freely. Four more Shadow Hounds appeared out of his dark sand.
Graig whipped his bow from his shoulder and started to shoot invisible arrows that took shape through his golden dust.
The Shadow Hounds that he struck fell into useless heaps of black sand. Vinicola ripped her whip from where it had been secured around her waist. She cracked out against the Shadow Hounds with cool precision. The other Shadow Hounds exploded into the sky, but they weren’t destroyed, they would re-emerge a couple of minutes later, whole once again.
It was useless for her to fight. She only gave him a couple of minutes asshe was still one of them, even though she’d made the choice to leave in her heart.
Graig made good use of all the minutes she gave him and when it was time for the full-on fight, they both took on two at a time.
He conjured his sword for battle and started slashing at his enemies.
“Graig!” Vinicola’s voice yelled in panic. She was captured, with a huge Shadow Caster’s arm around her neck.
Defeat! Their plan was ruined. He knew he wouldn’t get a second chance with her.
As he stood there, an axe hit him straight in the back, the dark sand ripping his veins apart. It hurt like hell. He could feel his golden sand seeping out of him.
Vinicola’s shrill scream pierced the night air around them.
He wasn’t going to survive this, but he’d made the choice for the loveof his life and their unborn child.
He took a Celestial out of his pocket— stood up with an axe still inside him—and mustered all the strength he had. He had mere moments toact before the others would come, or worse, take her away.
He threw the Celestial hard on the ground near her feet and yelled the word “San Francisco” as loud as he could. A bright light blinded all the Shadow Casters. She closed her eyes tightly.
Vinicola knew what to do and he watched as she, and the Shadow Caster who had his arm around her neck, disappeared.
The Shadow Caster would die. His DNA wasn’t attached to the Celestial, and he wouldn’t make the trip.
Graig had won. Just then something sliced through his neck and he fell to the floor. The last image he saw was a body without a head… before everything went black.
SIXTEEN YEARS LATER
“Crap, crap, crap,” were the only words that left my mouth as I took each painful step. Rollins knew just how to give ballet lessons that were straight from Nick’s pit. A stabbing pain ran up my calf and I had to stop as it went into a spasm. That should teach me to be late for class.
If it hadn’t been for Clare Bean—yep, her surname was Bean, which led to plenty of teasing when she was little—I would’ve been on time. I would’ve had that extra ten minutes to stretch.
We had always been friends, Clare and I, since we were crawling around in diapers. Her house was a couple down from mine and our moms were all too happy to bring us over for play dates. But since Ass and Abs, Taylor Winchester, had come into the picture, Clare had gone all gaga. Friendship didn’t seem to mean a thing to her anymore.
At first he hadn’t been too bad. He’d always had a thing for Clare, but a month ago at his party, we’d been sort of trapped in the basement alone for a couple of minutes and he’d declared his “undying love and affection” to me. Me, Chastity Blake! I’d rejected his affection, using finger quotes. Every girl my age knew what guys, especially the ones who looked like Ty, meant when they declared their affection to you.
Clare was my best friend. What else was I supposed to do? I’d thought the idiot would feel like stinky feet and forget about it, but no, he decided to teach me a lesson and told Clare that I’d made a move on him.She’d actually believed the dog.
Now for the past four weeks I’d had to endure humiliation on a daily basis. First it was the posters on every locker with guys’ names crossed out. The entire baseball team from what it looked like. The heading was Chastity Blake’s To-Do List.
It was so lame, but coming from her, it hurt. It hurt a lot.
I thought everyone would forget about that in a week, but they didn’t.
Then came the exploding paint in my locker. I struggled to get the red paint out of my hair and had walked around with it for an entire week. Mymom almost had a heart attack, acting all strange. She even suggested that we pack up and leave. I had to calm her down, even though by this point, I kind of wanted to disappear, too.
Today, they locked me in the girl’s bathroom. I crawled out the window,which wasn’t easy. That was why I was late today.
Still, I tried to ignore it, even though it came from my best friend. Standing up to them would only cause more shit.
As I kept walking, the fork in the road approached. One path led throughthe city. Five traffic lights with many twists and turns flashed though my head. The other path led past the lake. No traffic lights and it was ashorter route. My mother forbid me to use that one. But today, I was so upset, I didn’t care.
I chose the lake. As I walked, my thoughts of my crappy situation consumed me. I regretted telling Mom not to pick me up from ballet; it was really starting to bite me in the ass. Literally. I felt tiny stabbing jolts of pain on my bum that ached with every step I took.
The next couple of years of school would probably suck if Clare’s pranks didn’t end soon and my father, sorry, stepfather, Tim “the military man” Swanson, wasn’t going to move just because of the social life epidemic I was experiencing.
I had never understood why Mom had married him. There wasn’t a time that I couldn’t remember Tim not being in our lives, but she was so different from him. She was a free spirit who loved to paint. She had a thing about dreams. Since I was little, she’s always asked me what I dreamt the night before. It was creepy to people that didn’t know my mom, but it didn’t bother me much.
Tim was easy to sum up. It was always “YES SIR!” and “NO SIR!” although he didn’t like the “NO” very much, and he loved the “HOW HIGH DO YOU WANT ME TO FREAKIN’ JUMP” type of thing. Our relationship never used to be like that, but the older I got, the harder he was on me. Mom stood up for me a lot, but I hated that they ended up fighting over stupid things I didn’t really want to do.
As the path wended alongside the lake, I brushed aside a tree branch, lost in thought. My relationship with the only dad I knew was everythingexcept the relationship a father and daughter should have.
Other relatives? I didn’t have them. It was always just Tim and Mom.
As I pondered my lack of family, something to the left caught my eye. It was parked right in front of the lake. My entire body felt as if someone had pulled a plug and let all the air out. It was Ty’s pick-up, and I knew who else would be with him inside it.
When I heard Derek Benson’s voice a little farther away, I knew it wasn’t just the two of them, but the entire freakin’ football team. They sometimes came here after practice and right now, I wished that I’d taken the other stupid road.
I watched as Clare’s figure jumped off his truck. She wasn’t as tall or as lean as me, thanks to the Asian blood that flowed through me, but she was not chubby either. She was of medium build, not that there was anything wrong with it.
Here we go!
“Oh look, if it isn’t the baseball team’s slut,” Clare shouted loudly. Everyone turned and laughed. If these were strangers that did this, it would’ve been different, but they weren’t; they used to be myfriends. We used to laugh together, make jokes at the table, and pass notes around in class. Even Nicole, who used to make up the rest of our little trio, had her nose in a teen magazine and pretended that nothing was about to happen.
I knew I should’ve just walked away, but today was different. I was tired, I ached from head to toe, I was in my still in my darn tutu, I’d just pulled my pants over my leotard and exchanged my ballet shoes for sneakers. I really didn’t have the time for her little charade of insecurity.
“The baseball team? Really? Now we know who has all the intellectual cells between the two of us,” I snapped and carried on walking.
“And who has all the grace and beauty,” Clare chirped.
“And also a shallow mind.” I couldn’t help myself. This was what happened when I started. It was like my mouth had its own passageway straight to my brain and I couldn’t do anything to switch it off.
“Oh, yeah, shallow-minded. At least I know what loyalty means, bitch.”
I laughed again. “Loyalty. Can you even spell it, Clare?” Instant regret jumped through my core. Hurt rose briefly in Clare’s eyes but vanished just as fast. She was dyslexic and I had been helping her with words ever since we were just tiny little things running around.
“I know how to spell slut, bitch, and skank.”
“Well, sorry to burst your bubble, sweetheart. I never did anything with Taylor. But wait, I tried to tell you that, and you still believed the son of a bitch.”
“That’s a lie, Chas,” Taylor said. “Seriously, you really expect people to buy that? I know what the guys in the locker rooms are saying. I’d never be with someone like you.”
Clare gloated as she looked with admiration at Taylor and the entire group laughed.
“Yes, Chas, why didn’t we ever get to see some of the action the baseball team got?” The blond guy with the dark eyes was inches from me, tugging at my tutu.
“I don’t know, Jake,” I slapped his hand away, “probably because you’ve taken too many hits on the football field and can’t even multiply two and two anymore.”
Jake laughed.
Suddenly, I was shoved from behind, and I stumbled forward. My backpack flew from my shoulder and fell hard on the road. I got up and when I turned around, Clare’s face was inches from mine. “So what, the guys are below your standard, is that it?”
“Yes,” I said. “It’s exactly that. I’ve been trying to tell you that, but for some reason it doesn’t want to sink into that closed mindof yours.”
“Stop saying that. I’m not stupid,” Clare yelled and shoved me again.
“Then what are we doing, Clare?” I yelled back. “We’ve been friends for ten years, ten years and you go and believe biceps and abs.”
Clare shook her head with her arms folded across her chest and looked the other way.
“I would never do that to you, but it doesn’t matter what I say, your mind was made up the minute that idiot felt like a rat and crawled back to you.”
“That is not what you said that night at the party.” Taylor had that smirk plastered on his face. “The night you decided to try and have allthis.” His hands ran up and down his body as if we needed a demonstration.
“Seriously?” I scoffed. “It just shows you how well you really knew me if you think I was going to fall for a tool like you. Screw you, asshole.”
“In your dreams.”
“Lame comeback,” I said as I pulled my backpack over my shoulder and walked on.
For a minute, I hoped today might be my lucky day and they would to leaveme alone and let me pass, but as I passed the second tree, Derek and Jake, both linemen, blocked me.
My heartbeat rose, but now wasn’t the time to show them a hint of fear. They were like a pack of wolves, animals that thrived on fear. “Get outof my way, Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum.”
They laughed. “Make us,” Derek sneered. Now I’d heard some rumors about him, and none of them were any good. Stealing his mother’s pills and drugging girls to have his way with them was the highest on that list. Despite the brave façade I maintained, he scared me.
“C’mon guys, let the skank go,” Clare said.
“They won’t do anything, sweetheart. They’re just messing with her abit,” Taylor said softly. I could hear Clare giggling. How could she enjoy this so much?
“Fine, just don’t do anything I wouldn’t,” Clare yelled.
I blurted, “Then it looks like I’m screwed.”Seriously, keep your freakin’ mouth shut.
Derek and Jake circled me as if I were a piece of meat. I closed my eyes as my heart thumped inside my chest. If I ran, their fun would begin, and I was no animal.
I opened my eyes. More members of the team joined in. Some of these guys had really been my friends, or so I’d thought. One of Derek’s wingmen,Mark, a guy with really short hair who looked like he had giant’s DNA flowing through his veins, came close and sniffed my hair. I whirled andglared at him. He laughed and backed a bit off.
“That is enough!” Nicole finally said as she put her magazine down andcame closer.
Tommy, a redhead who was an extra on the football team, grabbed her.
“Let me go, you idiot,” Nicole yelled at him and he laughed.
“Clare, make them stop, for crying out loud. It’s Chastity.”
“Good, maybe it will teach her to stay away from her best friend’s boyfriends.”
“She didn’t do it,” Nicole said. “Taylor is a douche.”
My spirits rose.Thank you, Nicole.
“Stay out of this, Nicole!” Taylor yelled. “Before I tell Clare about your little schemes.”
“What schemes?” Clare asked, but I blocked out the rest as the ogres were really starting to freak me out. Would they have their way with me?If they did, would Clare and Nicole really watch as they took their turns? My gut roiled with sick terror.
“Ooh, look, I wonder what the little ballet princess is hiding underneath those slacks of hers.” Derek touched the hem of my slacks. Islapped his hand hard, and more of the guys started to touch me.
“Get the hell away from me.”
“Clare, make them stop!” Nicole yelled again.
“No, she deserves it.”
Fury and outrage swirled through me along with the panic. Her words angered me as my heart beat faster. I thought I might pass out. My head spun.
Instead, inexplicably, I felt loose, soft grit inside my hand—a lot of it. As I rolled the material around my fingers, it felt as if the entire world stopped for a second, or just slowed down.
I could smell Derek’s smoke-breath close to me; it stank. I felt the soft, warm breath of Sam, another idiot, on my face.
A mixture of cheap cologne overpowered me as the four guys stood crowdedaround me. Their hands grabbed my arms and clothes.
Then I saw the grit in my hands. It was soft, not like sand, and it had a light golden color.
At once the slow motion stopped. I threw a handful of the stuff, hittingMark full in the face. He crouched and tried to get it out his eyes. I felt more sand in my hand and Jake was next. I didn’t know where it camefrom or how any of this was even possible, but right now that didn’t matter. As I threw a handful at each and every one of them, a refill waited patiently in my palm.
Derek was next and before I knew it, all the boys were coughing and crouching down. One by one they fell over, in a fetal position with eyesclosed and soft snores coming from their lips.
Clare and Ty ran to the guys and crouched down. From the sound coming from their lips I knew they were alive. I waited for men with cameras to jump out from behind the trees, yelling GOT YOU or something, but it didn’t happen.
The fear on both Ty’s and Clare’s faces was real.
“What did you do?” Ty yelled.
“Nothing they didn’t deserve!” I yelled back, hoping he would just back the hell off.
“You’re a freak!” Clare yelled, and stormed at me. More sand accumulated in my hand, but to me, she was still my best friend, one whose mind had been closed by the idiot—who was busy running away.
I opened my palm and let the grit fall to the floor. A breeze picked it up and blew it softly into Clare’s face.
She stopped in her tracks, give a huge yawn and lay down on the ground.
Was she sleeping?
I looked at my hands. The grit was gone. There weren’t even traces of it inside my palm. Nothing made sense.
“Just go,” Nicole said as she crouched down next to Clare to investigate.
I stood still as a statue trying to process what was happening to me.
“Chastity!” Nicole yelled again. “Go!”
I looked down at Nicole. My legs finally started to move in the direction of home. I grabbed my backpack, which had fallen on the turf.
I reached Chicago fast and almost ran into a police officer who was chatting to a waiter. Guilt over what I’d just done was evident on my face so I ran in another direction.
“Hey, you there, stop!” he yelled.
I didn’t listen. He chased me for a couple blocks, but he couldn’t keep up. I took so many turns down back alleys that when I finally stopped I had no idea where I was.
I breathed hard and looked back at my hands. There was still no trace of the grit. It had just vanished. My heart beat fast again and cold sweat dripped from my temple. My mind’s eye relived the ogre-like bodies, almost the entire football team, falling down when I threw the grit at them. Coach was not going to like this, and how was I going to explain any of it to anybody?
What the hell did I just do?I stared at my hands. What the hell was happening to me?
