I was restless.
His voice over the phone was so meek but dangerous. I had a feeling it was about the video I received from the anonymous entity. The words he uttered; ‘Come see me.’ rang in my head as I threw on a jean jacket for the clouds above seemed dark and brewed a heavy fall. I ran to my gate where the uber I ordered sat waiting in front. I knew the level of his anger was almost at its peak because the driver he normally sends to get me was nowhere to be found. He never forgets to send Dan.
I rush to open the back door of the black camry as the wind caught up sending me sliding over the seat in haste to get out of the cold. With a shaky breath, I ask the driver to proceed our destination.
|•|•|•|•|
“Isn't this you?!” He yelled.
He was already getting irritated from me keeping still and quiet. I just couldn't help it. I was in shock and I was confused. I didn't understand how it could have happened or what I could do. I was trying to figure out how I could explain the situation to Naade but he doesn't even look like he wants to hear me speak at the moment. Different questions filled my head. The who? The how? The when? The why? But all I could process properly was that I am going to lose him and it was evidently clear.
“I know it looks like me but I swear..I–”
“It looks like you? It is you Iremide! Just save it! I dont want to hear any excuse from you. I gave you everything. Everything Mide! Yet, you decided to go around, fornicat–” I didn't give him the pleasure of completing that statement as I gave him a hard slap. He dare not disrespect me.
His chest starts heaving and his breathing gets ragged by the second. I don't know how to defend myself but all I could do was finally take slow steps backwards from the spot I had rooted myself in as his seething gets worse.
“You crossed the line. Get out of my house.” he says, his voice dangerously low.
“I didn't do it Naade, I promise you. I don't know how to explain this but you know I would never do this.” I say, placing my palm on both sides of his face to force him to look straight into my eyes. I stare at the chocolate orbs of his that always made me melt like a candy placed in the sun. He softened just a little bit as he made contact with mine. I could see he was fighting himself inside. He was trying to conclude that it wasn't true but he didn't want to give in. I was an open book to Naade. I never hid anything from him. I never lied about where I was going so why won’t he believe me now? At this point, tears are running wild on my cheeks refusing to stop. How could they? My heart is breaking to shards.
“C'Mon this is the video right here. What else is there to explain? So fun mi naw?!” he explodes as he releases himself from my hold.
“I was never-” I try to explain to him but he doesn't even want to listen. Where did all the trust and love go?
“Just leave.”
“Naade, listen to–”
“I SAID GET OUT!” he shouts. I freeze completely from the loudness of his voice and all I can hear is the heavy beating of my heart. Naade had quite a temper and it was something I knew how to handle well but seeing him now; bellowing and steaming, I knew how badly he was hurt. I proceed to gather my belongings which has been distributed all over the floor of the living room from throwing it in anger. I still can't wrap my head around the thought that he believes that.
With my bag in the crutches of my elbow and a wavering voice, I bring myself to say, “I know I am a lot of things. Sometimes a handful but if there is one thing I'm sure about myself is that when I'm committed to anything, I stay Loyal to it! I hope you will remember that, Naade.” With those words, I turn on my heel heading for the door but his voice stopped me, my back facing him. “Do you know what I feel for you right now? Despise. I despise you will all that I have, Iremide.” his voice choking slightly on the tears he is desperately trying to hide. It broke me to hear him say that. It felt like a hammer was continously pounding nails in my soul. I gripped the fabric of my shirt in the position of where my heart is and squeezed as tight as I could from the pain. It hurt too much. Without a second glance back at the home I had gotten so used to, I slam the door closed and stood there in the pouring rain. At this point, I don't know how to feel. I am numb all over but somehow my tears are still flowing. I'm not even sure if it was the rain or just salty water on my cheeks but one thing was certain. Years of happiness, laughter and the so called ‘love’ just ended. I was like a broken soul with no future under the rain.
