Before we met, everything was quite simple, happy and boring. I'm getting ready for my graduation. I didn't expect that it is also stressful from financial to things that I need to use. Having a problem with myself, I lack confidence because I saw myself getting thinner even though I'm not on a diet.
My classmate said when it's our graduation picture "What happened to you? You look thinner now. Are you okay?".
I just said one reasonable situation "My dog died, I'm still not healed". But deep inside the reason is.
My days before I graduate are very stressful, I'm near to giving up. I feel like I'm not happy anymore. I'm pressured to do a lot of things because they are hoping that I will have success. I got anxious because of that. It's very hard to handle and heal all by myself. I can't take care of my health.
My mother says to me "You need to gain weight for your graduation in just one month, look at yourself you're so thin, your dress does not suit you".
After that I cried at night before I went to sleep because it hurt me. I still tried my best to do it, I ate a lot but after one month I didn't make it. I don't know what to do to gain weight.
During these days, I applied to two companies for a job before my graduation. I wear formal attire just to make sure that I have a good briefing for them.
On our way to the graduation venue. I checked my phone and got a missed call from one of the companies I applied to. I texted the HR person and said "I'm sorry miss, I missed your call because I'm on my way to our graduation".
She replied to me "Okay miss, inform me when you are available".
Still thin so I'm not very happy before and during my graduation, I don't have any confidence. I just realized that I'm so proud of myself that I made it to the end. To the end of my school days. I'm not very close to my classmates so I only had some pictures with them. Until graduation, I felt alone and still thanked my mother that day so it's not too sad.
Maybe I will have a true friend when I get a job and meet my coworkers. I hope that I will get just one, not expecting many.
I replied to HR after the graduation " Hi miss, I'm available tomorrow, thank you". I think that is for the initial interview after I sent it.
During the graduation ceremony, I texted all of my internet friends that I already graduated and sent a picture of mine to them, wearing a graduation outfit and holding a certificate.
After graduation, we decided to go home already because our home is far from the venue. It's hard for us to commute because nowadays terminals change and it's rush hour.
Just got home, I did everything that I needed to do. I sat and came to a site where strangers you can talk to. I talked to some. It's dangerous on that site, strangers might disrespect you but some of them are nice like the two guys I've talked to. Especially the other one that changed my routine.
