Chapter 1
Brittany
I watched from a distance, as they came and went from the bar hosting karaoke, some staying outside to smoke.
The way they dressed had my styrene from the forest night I saw them.
Leather, and corsets as if it were jeans with tee shirts.
Chokers that look like collars.
The way they acted was dissent but I couldn't put my finger on it.
Some were so loud, and confident, while others wete standing back quietly, only speaking when spoken to.
They were lighting the cigarettes of others, or going to fetch things on command.
Then, they come across the street to the French bakery where I hide out on Thursday nights.
Thursdays are date night for my roommate.
Which actually means dinner and 'I haven't seen you all week' sex with her boyfriend.
Sometimes I say I am working, on school work or stuff for my internship.
I claim to have a date now and then so my roommate stays off my back.
I do work on stuff I need to and enjoy a glass or two of wine, maybe a nice pastry but mostly, I people watch.
I am shy, quiet, and all the cliches that go along with a young woman burdened with self esteem issues.
High school wasn't entirely awful, sure some people were shitty, but that is life.
My parents didn't hit me or anything, they just never understood me but, in their minds they were always doing what was best for me, protecting me, even from myself.
The group that catches my eye, walked in and sits in the back room as always.
Some faces changed week to week, but most were regular.
The short brunette had not missed a Thursday that I can remember.
She seemed to be, in charge, I guess you could say.
I have never seen her pull out her own chair, get her own drink, or light her own cigarette.
The group laughed, ordering various things.
When I check my watch I headed to the restroom.
When I came out of the stall, I saw the brunette looking in the mirror so I quietly washed my hands.
Dani: 'I'm Dani.'
'Brittany.'
I smiled up at her in the mirror and hung my head back down.
I turned off the water and reached for a paper towel.
Dani: 'You are in here a lot, I have noticed.'
'Um yeah, I need to be out of my apartment on Thursdays.'
Dani: 'Interesting.'
I just nodded and threw my paper towel away.
'Ha-have a good night.'
I went back to my table and began packing my things.
Dani walked up and looked at the various papers I have on the table.
She ran her finger down one with my information on it and then put her hand on her hip.
Dani: 'You have a good night too, Brittany.'
She winked and walked back to the room with her group.
My heart seemed to be speeding up so I finished packing my things and left a tip on my table.
The entire way home I replayed the brief but powerful moments with her.
She had a presence like no one I had ever met before.
I slowly and carefully opened my front door.
There were no animal-like sex noises, so I was safe.
I grabbed a water from the fridge and went to my room.
Washing my face, brushing my teeth, she stayed in my head.
I changed into pajamas and crawled into bed before pulling out my tablet.
I saw I had a new email and opened it.
'Ever feel, out of place? Like you have to hide your desires and urges for fear you'll be judged, shamed, or humiliated? Like no one could understand the sexy, sick and twisted things in your mind?
You have either received this email because you've requested information from someone, or someone has noticed you, and thinks you may seek something we can provide. Friday afternoon at 3 someone will be reading a Rolling Stone magazine from years ago, with the Spice girls on the cover, outside the Starbucks on the corner of 4th and Main.
There's no need to be afraid, you're in no way being forced or threatened. Simply being presented with an opportunity.
No one is meant to be truly alone in this world, take the chance to find where you belong.
I really hope to see you there, Brittany.
-D'
