my name is Jordan and am a twenty six years old execuitive in a bankrupt company I might not be the most decent man out in the world but at least I am doing ok for myself.
am not rich neither am I poor if you ask me I would say am the clueless guy in the middle status class.
my life practically is a boring story but I do want to share it with you so here it goes, I finished for the day , went outside greeted Alfred on my way out he was like the only person who has ever shown me respect in this goddamm forsaken company I work at.
And if you are wondering who Alfred is well he is the security guard and he always had a smile on his face
some times I wish I could just be like him and smile all the time but my life is like watch a black and white movie bland with no taste, and no colour.
I stop a taxi and got in " tech valley " I said and the driver zoomed off and started the journey he was playing that old Michael Jackson song "do you remember" it got me so bad that I started trying to remember what made me someone who has lost his smile I racked my head hard but I still couldn't figure out when it all changed so instead of trying to remember the bad feelings I tried to remember when the good one started and at that moment a tear feel off my face as I remember issabella the love of my life
since I had been born into this world I have only been attracted to one lady , only loved one lady, only adore one lady , only confess my feelings for one lady I rest my head on the windscreen of the backset in the Car and reminisce on my past memory on my own.
Issabella she was the most beautiful girl at the class back then , also her dad was the most wealthiest of all my class mates dad's
I did know when it happened but I knew from the first time I set my eyes on her I was stuck I was utterly in love every time I tried to talk to her I always lost courage, would stammer up and down it felt difficult to always find the right words when speaking with her, every time she got into a fight I always defended her like my life depended on it she might have felt I was the shy type so she was the one who shook hands with me back then while smiling brightly and said "let's be friends for ever jordan"
those words still resides in my heart till this moment I could remember smiling like a clown through out the day could not get that smug look of my face I was extremely happy , didn't even want to wash that hand she held every time i saw Bella I saw perfection, I knew I was a goner in love after months of being friends and being close I still could not open up my feelings for her, I became her shadow and saw her turned down lot of guys which made me both happy and sad , happy cause she was still single , sad cause I felt I would never get my own chance or I was not worthy enough to ask her out , cause I felt if those guy who were super rich could not win her heart how would I, Jordan who could not even pay her snack money even enter her eyes I was comfortable just being the friend
I was too young to understand what a friend zone meant but I friend zoned myself by myself for so long i always pictured and fantasised dating Bella and making all her wished come through I had big plans to make her happy I was working hard even in my studies to make sure I could be worthy of her in the future
only for my hopes to be killed fast before the feelings even grows when she disclosed to me she was travelling out of the country cause her dad just got a new contract only if he moved to Spain and there's was definitely no way Bella's dad would leave his family out here definitely he was talking then with him
i was supposed to be congratulating my friends with a happy heart but I was congratulating her with a heavy heart , I felt so like my whole world came crumbling down I felt like I was going to die , that same day before Bella boarded her ride back home I screamed her name and confessed my feelings towards her
but the only think she said back in return was " silly boy " and a chuckle, she left with no other words ohhhh if only I knew that was gonna be the last time I would see her , I don't really know but I think I might have tried better at expressing my feeling on time and enjoy all the moments we shared I always thought we had all the time in the world and I would confess at a later date only to get the shock of my life when she left.
The next day I came to school I look at her desk and saw it empty she wasn't there she never came back I think that's when all my ambitions died out ever since then I have been living a blank life like a robot with no colour
the friends I later made said I would get over it but I never did I could not even get attracted to any girl or like any girl talk less of even falling in love again I knew at that moment she was the one my heart always gonna yearn for , I could not change that , the heart wants what the heart wants .
" you have arrived at your destination " the taxi driver voice brought me out of my fantasy memory replay and brought me back to reality yea am Jordan twenty six years , old still single and I still have a life to live , life goes on.
