"Nonsense!"
he shouted as his eyebrows draw closer together, everyone stops and stares at him, murmurs fill the room,
"Why will father allow something so low have our brother?!" again in a louder voice, everyone stops talking, now silence fill the room.
"This is a memory, I remember this, I remember I was angry, but who are these people?"
"Why am i seeing this?"
Suddenly every thing is swirling around, everything is becoming a fuzzy cloudy scenery, everthing is blurry then it becomes dark, darkness cover everything, I cannot see anything, I feel my body moving forward, like being pulled into something, pulled into the darkness.
Slowly the images become clearer, but everything is different, I am in a hot place, I am now sitting on a rock, the sun is directly touching my face, it is painful, like a fire slowly getting closer to your skin, burning and leaving its mark upon my face.
The wind does not help either, it carries the warmth of the sun with it, slowly drying up everything around me, my sweat are even dried up from the heat, where was I again?
I remember now, I came to the desert, to learn about myself, something inside me wants to tell me who I really am.
From that fuzzy memoryit seems I have returned to my body, this is reality, this is real, this is me, but who is that standing in front of me, it is me, I see myself standing before me, that is my face, long wavy hair, brown skin, medium built taller than the average man here,
am I suppose to talk to myself?
"who are you?" I asked
"who are you?" it answers back, or is it merely mimicking me?
"are you copying me?" I whispered,
"no, I am asking if you know who you are" it answered,
so it has thoughts of his own,
"do you?" it says,
"no, that is why I am here, to know who I am" I answered,
people around me says I am not an ordinary man, and after meeting my cousin, who is considered a prophet, also told me to come here to know myself and what I must do,
but....
"how long has it been?" I ask myself as I look around for any indication of how long I have been here,
"three days" says the image of myself,
"I am hungry"
"WE are hungry" he replied
"but we must remember first, you need to know who you are" he added,
again my vision blurs, ligth passing through my eyes, everything is spinning, it is as if I am moving forward although I am sitting, I am being projected to somewhere again, my body is moving so fast, faster that riding a carriage pulled by horses,
or am I dying? is this death?
everything is dark again, then the scenery changes,
again I am where I was before, not in the same room but in a place having similar atmosphere, I feel I am at home, I feel comfort, like the feeling when my mother carry me on her arms, I remember this feeling, the warmth, yes, this feels like home.
green grass, white smoke cover parts of the path, I am barefooted, this place seems endless, this place is big, I cannot see the end of it, there is no horizon, the sky and the ground just goes on and on and on,
I keep walking forward,
I am angry, about what? why am I angry?
"Open the gates!" I said,
Angels?
I see people with white wings wearing robes, they have swords on their waists, are these angels? weird, I thought angels only appear in dreams or temples, but not like this, maybe I am dead, I am in front of a golden gate, this is the after life, I have heard of this, Uriel is to welcome you so they say,
Seems I have died from hunger, I will talk to them then, maybe they can confirm my cause of death,
they see me, they get rattled, they look afraid, one rushes to the middle of the gate and pulls it as his wings flaps backward to help him in drawing the gate to the other side,
I wanted to speak but I have no voice, I wanted to know how I died but I could not,
If so,
then this is a dream or a memory, my memory?
This seems to be the heaven they described,
I was in heaven before? or is this hell?
More angels come to the gate, rushing, but now with long horns, as they get ready to blow the horn to signify my arrival,
"Stop that! Move aside!" I shouted,
everything is so small, compared to me that is,
an angel flies upward to my head,
this is taking too long,
I grab him and and carry him upward,
I open my palm in front of my head, I release the winged person,
"When I say move, you move aside, Angel!" I shouted with a loud voice,
the winged person trembles,
"An Archangel dare block and hinder a Seraphim, and the highest amongst them none the less" with authority and arrogance on my voice,
The person with wings sweat in fear, almost turning white as he shakes his head and says
"No sir",
he moves aside and floats down, as he slowly descend he bow his head as he places his right hand on his stomach and extends his left hand pointing toward the opened gate as if wanting me to enter,
I guess I am somebody here,
as I walk towards the gate my body shrinks, still taller than the winged persons who stands besides the gate as I pass them, some kind of magic? or something else? sorcery?
They bow as I enter, everyone bow as I enter a place that makes me feel warmth and care, as if embracing my body per step I take towards it, it feels like home.
The place is huge, gold pavements on the walk path, houses and skycrapers of silver homes, everything is shiny, flags are gold, cements are silver, is this coated or really pure gold and silver, this is a very rich town, I have not heard of any stories about a gold and silver city, I have seen big houses and different establishment but nothing of this sort,
I see more winged person going about, walking and flying, some are running while their wings are moving giving them a boost of speed , some seems afraid or shy as they hastely fly faster upon seeing me.
They seem to know me, some bow, some run away, who was I? was I a king or something? was I royalty?
I have heard of Sultans in the desert if you go west but they are only stoties of travelers I have met, none of them have ever told a story about a place like this,
I continue to walk around,
I see a big place, something is written, I cannot read it,
then the letters suddenly moves and changes,
"Halls of worship"
I can read it, but what is this place, I see winged persons singing like a choir, on another side I see them bowing, some are sitting, some are kneeling, different positions,
worshiping? yes must be different way of worshiping, I have heard of this, people worship differently.
I walk along, It seems like I do not worship.
I smell incense, it is coming from the next building, I see a beautiful stained glass window, I have never seen anything like this before,
beautiful,
just beautiful,
I must try to imitate this when I get back.
This seems like an extension of the Halls of worship.
I see "Library",
I enter and look for a book,
"found it" I said, "how to make fire",
I start reading the book,
make a lightning and hit something flameable like wood or leaves.
Make? Make lightning hit?
We can control lightning?
I raise my pointing finger and start to create sparks, I touch the book with the spark, the page catches fire, I blow hard to exringuish the fire and use my palm to put it out, smoke begins to rise from the burnt page, I raise my head and look around if anybody saw, luckily nobody is here.
I seem happy.
The book says, man use wood tipped on one end and placing hays or wood fibers at the bottom, then using a bow, spin the wood as it starts friction creating heat then fire.
"Crafty humans" I say.
I walk outside again,
I see waterfalls and a great scene, a great view, peaceful and relaxing.
I walk to a tree, really tall, really big, I maybe able to grab it in one hand if I was my regular size, but in this size will take about 4 of me to wrap around it,
"Yes"
the tree speaks,
"Hello old friends" I say to the tree,
"we see what may happen to those after us, but you are the eldest amongst us and so we cannot see" the tree replied,
"Is it not more fun when you do not know the future, friend?" I jested,
"For you maybe, for us, no, knowing to be ready is better than to wonder and guess" he replied,
I laugh at the tree to comfort its worries.
I see a massive dome of pure crystal that has tall spires. The spires catch light and refract the light into a dazzling rainbow show.
Everyone passing it is amazed, they stop to look, they love watching the rainbow created by the reflection, everyone loves this place,
and yet,
I seems to despise them,
I do not like everyone,
I feel disgusted looking at them,
I do not know why, this is a mere memory, but what I feel it, the feeling is so real, so I remember well.
